13th February

Weather: Started cool, but turned out to be a perfect day for golf

Winners: Morning –  BW; Afternoon –  Erick; Day – DP

Highlights

Lowlights 

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Weather: Absolute perfection - cloudless skies all day, little wind and pleasantly warm in the afternoon

Winner : Morning –  Jock; Afternoon –  Jock; Day – Jock

Highlights

Lowlights 

A difficult one this, but the location and weather are probably entitled to top billing

Outstanding performance by Jock, sweeping all before him on the day.

Closely followed by double eagles from Messrs. Lindsay and Wood

Catering and staff on the day were once more excellent - particularly fine lunchtime soup and sannies

Organiser failing to pull in additional body at last minute to bring numbers up from, as he thought, 15 to 16, having forgotten himself in his calculations - no names no pack drill!

Presentation by Bamburgh Captain of two bottles of his wine for our group.

Look on Jock's face as he was about to open one of said bottles for general consumption when being told it was a vintage worth £65 per bottle - not true - much to relief of the great man.

Presence of honoured guest, Chazza

Jock narrowly failing to shoot his age in the afternoon round - but safe bet to be the first Freen to perform the feat!

Situation encapsulated in Jock's comment after match against Muir "I don't mind when I lose, but I hate winning and not being paid."

Having been suddenly and sorely laid low by a back injury and so (just as well for the numbers) being unable to play - not to mention having, therefore, unnecessarily cancelled a day of patients - Bob W. decided to bring his Mum and Dad down on a day trip to meet his Freens, being greeted (by JM) with an alarmed "What are you doing here?", suggesting he was about to bugger up the numbers for the afternoon..

17th April

Good weather and excellent lunch

Winning re-appearance by double grandfather, Erick

Entire outing being held up in the morning by Kilspindie Captain's 4 ball that had empty holes ahead of it!

Weather:   Started cool and distinctly breezy, but warmed up during the day .  Also became bright and sunny and we were missed by all the wet stuff rushing past us.

29th May

Winner : Morning –  Erick ; Afternoon –  DP ; Day – DP

A very disappointing turnout for this little gem in Fife.  The Geordies were no doubt recovering from the celebrations following the undeserved (by its owner) survival of their club to struggle again in the Premier League, and the East Lothianites were missing for the reason stated by them (and ignored by the majority) at the A.G.M. on account of a clash of dates.  Just as well, therefore, that there was an outstanding show of solidarity by the comrades from the People’s Republic of Morningsideski!

Highlights

It’s fair to say that the weather over the east of Scotland this day was varied and a highlight has to be the fact that we played two rounds in the best of it at all times with squalls all around us (with pictures to prove it!)  This weather also helped to explain the description of Pebble Beach as “the USA’s Aberdour.”

Greens in their slopes and undulations gave a fair representation of what a putting experience Augusta must be.

Phil’s second shot to the 17th was a masterpiece of precision.  He clearly knew that simply hitting the ball straight at the group on the 18th tee would be boringly predictable.  What he opted for instead was to smack his shot into a tree approximately half way between them and the 17th green.  The noise of the impact made them start and turn, just in time to see Phil’s ball hurtling at them from behind - but no further impacts ensued.

Winner’s relatively alcoholic lunch must deserve a mention - did the trick again!

While the food provided for lunch and high tea was very pleasant the portions were on the niggardly side.  Fish in particular was considered by Freens to be on the sprat side, rather than the whale.

Jock’s consternation on the 9th tee in the morning when he discovered that his companions each had 4 skins while he had none.

The curious incident on the next tee (possibly as a result of discovery on previous tee) when the usually serene and imperturbable brow of Jock was seen to be puckered and his face darkened as he cried in woe, “”I’’ve lost my pipe!”  Fortunately serenity returned a few seconds later when he discovered the sneaky little fumigator had been hiding in his hand!

One Freen, who has still not come forward, ticking Homemade Steak Pie and then tucking into DJ’s fish come teatime!

Lowlights 

• What we avoided!

26th June

Weather:   Disappointingly dull all day with periods of drizzle and the odd wee shower.

Winner : Morning –  DL; Afternoon –  Psycho; Day – Psycho

Turnout definitely picked up from last time, but still on the low side for another gem of a course in Fife.

At one point it looked as if the attendance would be even lower, hence the  strapline above<, on account of Erick relying on his SatNav which took him to a housing estate and its three cul-de-sacs!  Situation saved by elderly biddy who said “If you just drive along a hundred yards or so, Sonny, and turn left at the sign that says ‘Dunfermline Golf Club’ you should find the place quite easily!”

Highlights

The course itself must take pride of place here.  It was an interesting layout in great condition with excellent greens and superb fairways.

Erick merits another mention here for one of his finest moments which occurred on the 13th tee in the morning round.  He managed to express three quite different, vehement and detailed moans about the quality of the strike of his tee shot between the moment of impact and the ball’s coming to rest about eight feet from the hole preparatory to his holing the putt for his third 2 of the round.  The founder and Life President of the DM (Disproportionate Moaners) Club is currently considering his position!

Collin being a passenger and so unable to drive home at lunchtime as a result of which he stayed to achieve a fine second place in the afternoon.

Lowlights 

We’re pretty sure that Jock’s appearance here again, so soon after the Aberdour pipe incident, is coincidental and doesn’t qualify as a syndrome, but it needs to be recorded that on the 9th green Jock grew quite excited when he came to realise that his was the closer of the two balls on the green and that there was no marker on the green from any other match.  He took it fairly well when it was gently pointed out to him that the lack of a marker was probably not unconnected to the fact that he was playing in the first match!

JM receiving - and answering - a call on his mobile ‘phone in the clubhouse.  That we should live in such modern times!!!!

Lady diner observing that “You lot are worse than a bunch of women!”

At high tea Jock enquiring, “What’s the next course? And instead of receiving the anticipated reply of “Apple crumble” (for example) was instead told “Bothwell Castle” by JM

“Worse than a bunch of women!”

28th August

Weather:   A bit of a mixture - half sunny, three quarters dry and with a couple of brief heavy showers

Winner : Morning –  Johnny D; Afternoon – Johnny D.; Day - Johnny D.

Once more turnout is the main theme for this outing and is the progenitor of the strapline.  Although the date was set about seven months in advance numerous Freens found that they could not make it come the day - very disappointing.

What was not disappointing, however, was that Johnny D.’s magnificent effort in coming up from the Toon was rewarded by a sweeping victory.  Well done, Johnny!

Highlights

Once more a good course in excellent condition must be deemed a highlight.  In spite of a very wet Summer in the west the course was dry with excellent playing surfaces.

Jock narrowly succeeding in avoiding walking through a mirror on leaving the toilets.

Digger celebrating his retirement in fine style with a nicely alcoholic lunch

Very good scran throughout the day.

Clubhouse manager presenting Barney with £60 overpayment which came as a complete surprise.

Lowlights 

If you juxtapose the words “Bob” and “keys”, do you need to know more?  Yes, the bold boy did it again and searches this time had to spread beyond the usual inverted golf bag.

Contest for R. Macqueen Memorial trophy for loudly expressed inappropriate comments at meal in evening between two well-known Burgess members (no me!)

Nasty encounter between Weegie and Geordie following the latter’s slight mishit of a teeshot (but he still got his par and Weegie backed down.)

JM about to launch his 3 wood second shot at the 304 yard 10th hole.

Jock finds a spot of bother with his tee shot on the same hole

Happy campers in front of the smart clubhouse

Bob and Barney gaze in awe at another fine putt from DJ

18th September

Weather:   Dry, windless and very pleasant

Winner : Juggy

This was a new venue for everyone on the tour and it’s fair to say that it exceeded expectations, from the fine old clubhouse to the quality of the course.  The most significant compliment paid to it was that people grew to like and appreciate it the more they played it.

Highlights

Our eagle-eyed Freen spotting Sellafield nuclear power station and the Cairngorms from the higher parts of the course. (N.B. in this context DP’s recent expedition - sponsored by the Royal Geographic Society - to ascertain the height and condition of the mountains of Orkney, last seen by the same Freen from Lossiemouth, proved unsuccessful as someone appears to have nicked them!)

A querulous comment by Rees on hearing that the bar would be open until 1.00 a.m. - “That’s a bit late, isn’t it?”  Changed days indeed - see comments on Bothwell Castle supra.

Lowlights 

Non-arrival of Doug for the golf because of the unfortunate passing of his pussy, only slightly mitigated by toast to the departed in the evening.

Collin being asked (by J. Muir) whether he would like to share a bath.  “None of that nonsense, thank you” replied the steady Mr. Wood.

Unavailing cri de coeur of “Come on Tonga!” from J. Muir during the England v. Fiji Rugby World Cup match.

On offering to Doog the last little slice of melba toast and lettuce leaf from the absent Psycho’s plate, Juggy being met with a somewhat sneering “What’s this?”  in  response from the great man.

Weather:   Very fine indeed

Winner : Morning –  Doog; Afternoon – .Collin; Day -  Doog

Highlights

It has to be Doog’s recovery from his bereavement and some uncharacteristic recent lack-lustre displays to scoot the morning round and take the honours for the day.

Only slightly behind the first highlight in order of magnitude was DJ’s excellent showing in the afternoon following a recent lean spell.

DJ having come to own the 18th hole.

Lowlights 

Tonga’s woes continuing in the World Cup as they lose to Georgia.

Another instance of the Freens reaching middle age as illustrated in the (somewhat fuzzy) photo below!

20th September

Weather:   Another fine day to finish our tour

Winner : Leo

Highlights

To be perfectly honest this should, in the eyes of the main protagonist, have gone down as a lowlight, but most of us will be content with its inclusion here.  On the first tee, after a late breakfast which had not had an entirely beneficial effect on the Kay mood, he was congratulated by a Lancaster G.C. Member on his recent success in the Labour Party leadership election.

After his memorable victory, Leo requiring no pit stops between Lancaster and Edinburgh on the way home.

Lowlights 

Tonga’s rotten weekend continues with a 3 - 1 defeat to Crystal Palace!

Most right-thinking Freens would regard a stubborn determination not to part with a trophy as being a little unseemly. Unfortunately this is a view that is not apparently shared by Messrs. Runciman and Watters who continue to make every effort to hang on to the Divot they so comprehensively scooped last year.  To-day it was the former who made the supreme effort, as testified by the illustration below - and, in case it might be of interest to any Freen in future, holding a mobile ‘phone next to the car while someone at the other end presses a distant key - disnae work!  (Dr. Bob feels your pain, Dave.)

Dunbar

31st October

Weather:  Report awaited

Winner: Collin

Highlights

Lowlights 

19th September

…but we can’t finish on a low note.  Here we see the most magnificent sight of the weekend that was sadly not captured, as would have been appropriate, at the front door of the castle —––––––>